Lock the door and wander off!

23 May

And now we gop over to Debs who saw something in the property pages in that crap free paper last night which had her hopping…

Bedford www

OY! Sod off, you ask me to write a Bypass blog and then interfere…

I saw something in the property pages of our lacklustre free newspaper (You woulnd’t buy it!)  last night which made me hopping mad and sums up everything that’s wrong with the housing market.  There is a 1 bed flat advertised in Castle Quay and the blurb goes ‘A perfect first home, buy to let or lock up and leave’. 

Lock up and leave.  Does this literally mean that? You buy it and it stays empty, in the hope that it will appreciate in value like a 1970s Cindy Doll in its box up in the attic.  Meanwhile, house prices in this country are crazy because not enough properties are being built, and people are waiting years for social housing or staying for years in substandard or too small social housing because there’s nowhere for them to go.  Mind you, at £137,500 the price is hardly extortionate for Bedford considering the facilities, so it must be pokey.  In fact, the photo of the sitting room makes it look as inviting as a dentist’s waiting room. 

Saw the sign, I waited around, god never came, I went to Oxfam!

Saw the sign, I waited around, god never came, I went to Oxfam!


And in a ground breaking first having struggled with reviews of the new X Men film where past and future collide in a confusing way as Captain Picard died a few films back here’s a blog from the future from the internationally respected media portal BEDFORD BYPASS from the year 2173. And if you are wondering how we got this its all down to our Back to the Future car which we invented in a few years. We invited you to invest in this sure cert and there’s still time but take rampant inflation into account and about £1000 should get your name on the log book.


The Future Sound of Bedford

The Future Sound of Bedford

“We struggled with the door, mostly the lock but also several hundred years worth of free crap newspapers on the other side with the Mayor on the front page but after a while we eventually kicked it in and there it was, preserved within the ruins of Castle Quay, a cheap hastily jerry built block of apartments was a genuine circa year 2000 flat exactly in the same grim conditions as when the owners locked up and sailed away! They tried to return but all got turned to dust as they all died in that nuclear reactor meltdown storyline that we started a few years back but have since forgotten where we left off!

McClinton Droid THX1138


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