Hiya! …..Been sorta quiet hasn’t it! This is Bedford Bypass back after three weeks sitting watching the sea coming in, going out, sun coming up and going down. Back in Bedford now and its like Groundhog Year…sod all has changed…mobius strip..looped life, its all the same….we are stuck in Bloody Chicken Town…
Psychic Sally and the spirits of the DEAD! Good Family entertainment!
Lets go for a night out…top quality family entertainment….oh look! ….It’s Psychic Sally coming to visit the lonely and bereft of Bedford for the umpteenth year on the trot…put you in touch with the dead… live on on stage at the Corn Exchange…for the umpteenth year running…but I’ve said that already… in front of our very eyes…is there a John in the audience?…the dead live on…and we in Bedford are so lucky that Sally…sorry Psychic Sally deigns to bring her skills in this interphase between two worlds right into the heart of town…a message for Margaret …maybe Marjorie..Mary…Maria…maybe..maybe…he says he’s happy in heaven…oooh….Janet, she she wants you to know that she wasn’t your real mother and she always despised you…
The blurb from the Corn Exchange says its for entertainment only…fun fun fun but don’t mention her recent night in Middlesborough when the picture of a supposedly dead woman turned out to be a very much alive woman sat in the audience. Spinning heads and projectile puking…demons from the other side…that’s your problem matey…Claims Direct might not be able to help if you go home with something horrid sat on you shoulder cackling and feeding off your very soul…but…Sally doesn’t do this sort of demon stuff….just random messages from nice dead people wanting to speak to nice live people…Martin you bastard…why did you leave it all to her…Martin…is that you…Martin!.
Do they have to have died in Bedford for Sally to bring them forth?…do the dead of Bedford eagerly wait for Sally to make her annual visit on the off chance that there earthbound kin are able to get tickets, or believe in fairies….What happens if you died in Coventry but your corpse is below ground in Bedford…or went up the chimney…No pushing in now you spirit people…oy! you…you with the medals…piss off …Sally’s in Watford next month. Sally is a busy person, she seems to be everywhere!
Sally herself looks radiant as you can see…in some recent photo’s she’s sort of lardy and aged but for Bedford she’s slim and radiant…looking years younger…you sceptics might think its reliance on old publicity pics but I believe…I believe….I believe that following death from heart based trauma..lung cancer…road traffic accident…maybe simple decay or just hypothermia from being unable to afford decent heating…I believe that Sally can summon you forth…to say “Hiya” before quickly moving onto Arthur, Alice, Janet who all wait patiently in spectral line for their fleeting moment of fame….
No Demons allowed at Bedford Corn Exchange! It says so…
Some people think that it’s a masterful con trick…Psychic Sally touring the UK constantly, no end of people wanting proof that that final challenged breath..vague pulse..juddering heartbeat…is just a temporary blip…keen to pass on their £££££ to Sally…Some websites would have us believe that Sally is raking it in…X amounts of venues per annum… X amounts of arses on seats X whatever it costs, £20 plus to get in..very negative….but there’s much more to it than that…I believe….I want to believe….
bedford bypass 